By Simon Daukes, Owner of Ash Barton Estate

When we opened the gates to Ash Barton Estate, we knew one thing for sure: we didn’t want it to feel like a wedding factory. We wanted couples to have space. Time. Freedom. A place to slow down, gather their people, and create something personal, without being told what colour the chair sashes have to be. We wanted couples to enjoy the whole weekend, not just the big moment. That’s what a DIY wedding weekend is all about.

It’s more than just a day. It’s a celebration you get to shape your way, from the Thursday night pizza oven to the Sunday morning tea and toast. You’re not just booking a day. You’re carving out an entire experience. From pizza in the garden the night before, to tea and toast in the big kitchen the morning after.

Here’s what we’ve learned after hosting hundreds of these magical weekends here in the Devon countryside.

1. Arrive Early, Settle In

One of the best bits? You don’t have to rush. The luxury of time is one of the biggest gifts you can give yourselves.

Most of our couples arrive on a Thursday or Monday, giving themselves time to unpack, unwind, and take in the space. At Ash Barton, guests often roll in throughout the day. The pace is relaxed. You can set out welcome bags, stock the fridges, pop open a bottle, or even light the fire if it’s chilly. There’s no wedding coordinator tapping their watch. The estate is yours. Pro tip: Plan something easy for the first evening. A pizza night, a curry delivery, or drinks in the courtyard. It’s not about entertaining, it’s just about settling in, together.

2. Make It Your Own… Maybe Think of It Like a Mini Festival

A DIY wedding doesn’t mean you’re winging it. It just means you get to decide what it looks like. It gives you the freedom to do things your way, but it helps to have a bit of structure.

Think of your weekend as a mini festival. You’ll want a loose timeline - ceremony, meals, dancing - and a few go-to people to help things tick along. We always recommend appointing one or two trusted “point people” who know the plan and can gently keep things moving.

Ash Barton is designed to flex:

Big group dinner in the dining hall? Absolutely.

Outdoor ceremony with hay bale seating? Done it.

Disco in the barn at 1am? Yes, and yes again. We have no curfews.

That’s why Ash Barton has no corkage fees. We don’t do restrictions. We do support and a whole estate for you to make your own.

We believe your wedding should feel like you, not like it’s been copy-pasted from someone else’s Pinterest board. (although we do have our own Pinterest board to help give you some ideas!)

3. Keep the Ceremony Simple, Beautiful, and Meaningful

The ceremony doesn’t have to be stiff or overly formal. Some of the most touching moments we’ve seen have involved dogs as ring bearers, grandparents as celebrants, or everyone standing in a circle in the garden.

You can use our ancient arch, decorate the barn, set up in the wildflower meadow… It’s completely up to you. We’ve even seen couples host unplugged ceremonies in the old chapel space, followed by confetti runs across the lawn.

Our advice? Keep it meaningful, simple, and you.

You don’t need to overcomplicate it. Choose readings that resonate. Write your own vows (or don’t). Involve your dog. Add live music. Skip the chairs. It’s your call.

And don’t forget the power of the setting itself. You’ve chosen somewhere pretty magical if you’re getting married at Ash Barton Estate, so you know your venue is going to be impactful, whether it’s full of your own bits and bobs or not.

4. Feed People Often (and Have Fun With It)

DIY doesn’t mean doing it all yourself. Plus, you don’t need to serve a five-course meal to impress people. It’s your day, not theirs.

We’ve had couples bring in food trucks, caterers, hog roasts, potluck dinners, and everything in between. At Ash Barton, the pizza oven is a Friday night staple.

The key? Keep it plentiful, low-stress, and on your own terms.

Psst — if you’re after a list of tried-and-tested caterers, DJs or anything else, we do have Recommended Suppliers list available.

5. Create Space for Down Time

Not everything needs to be scheduled. The most memorable moments are often the unplanned ones. Leave space for garden games, walks in the fields, a spontaneous karaoke session in the disco room, or just lounging in the sun with a coffee.

DIY weddings work best when there’s breathing room. Your wedding weekend isn’t just about the big moments.

Ash Barton has enough indoor and outdoor nooks for people to find their quiet joy, especially helpful if you’ve got kids, grandparents, or just a mix of energy levels in the group.

6. Send-Offs Are Optional (but Lovely)

Some couples do a Sunday brunch, others just wave guests off with hugs and hangovers. The Sunday morning goodbyes always tug on the heartstrings. Either way, a slow farewell is a beautiful end to the weekend.

Some couples do a casual brunch, others let everyone fend for themselves with leftovers and strong coffee in the kitchen. There’s no pressure. You’ve had your big day, and now you get to soak in the afterglow.

Many couples tell us that staying the extra night on Sunday is the best decision they made. No rush. No packing up in a panic. Just time to breathe it all in before heading back to reality. So, if you’re staying an extra night to soak it all in, your ‘after-the-wedding’ stage will be even better.

Final Thought: Do it Your Way, But Don’t Do it Alone

A DIY wedding weekend at Ash Barton is designed to feel like yours, not ours. But that doesn’t mean you’re left on your own.

Our team is here to help in the background, and we’ve got the recommendations, checklists and friendly nudges if you need them.

After all these years, we still get excited for every single wedding — because no two are ever the same. And that’s exactly the point. We’ve seen it done a hundred different ways, and the best ones always have the same thing in common: they feel like you.

– Simon