Ash Barton is the best DIY wedding venue around and it means our brides and grooms get to have their wedding day exactly how they want it. It also means we get to see some truly creative weddings. But none have been quite as memorable as Jane and Brendan’s wedding back in 2018. We finally caught up with Jane to ask her a few questions about the big day.

Let's start at the beginning. Tell us about the proposal

"This is quite a story. We’d been to Brighton with friends about a year before and visited Brighton Pavilion. In the dining room I’d mentioned in passing that it was one of my favourite rooms and said: ‘could you imagine having dinner here?’

"Brendan set his mind on proposing there and had to negotiate hard with the team who manage the Pavilion. They typically don’t let you rent it out, as it’s Royal Palace. But he was very persistent and won them over in the end.

"To get me to the Pavilion, Brendan invented a party that was due to happen at the Dome next door. He’s a graphic designer and mocked up a fake flyer including the dress code. It could have all gone horribly wrong as it rained during the day, so we had a very long and boozy lunch and when it got to the evening, I told him I didn’t fancy it anymore! Thankfully he managed to drag me out. Even when he told the cab driver to drop us off at the Pavilion rather than the Dome, I still didn’t suspect a thing.

"When we finally got to the Pavilion and a rather excited looking lady opened the door and said ‘good evening, we’ve been expecting you’ I knew something was up but I still wasn’t sure what. She led us into the dining room (which is huge, have you been?) and at the end of the room by the fire was a table set for two. Standing next to the table was a butler with a bottle of Dom Perignon and in the opposite corner of the room was a string trio, playing just for us.

"It was so special to have such an incredible place to ourselves. At that point I knew what was coming and thankfully Brendan asked me straight away, once I’d had a minute to take it all in. We had an incredible meal and even had a tour of the Pavilion!"

That’s some proposal. So how did you plan the wedding? And why choose Ash Barton?

"We wanted space for 150 guests and somewhere that was far enough away from London so friends would commit to a couple of days away, rather than just coming for the wedding itself. And it gave them time to ‘bond’ before the big day itself. Secondly, we wanted different areas we could use, as we wanted to move the wedding party between ‘scenes’ as the day progressed.

"We also wanted somewhere old but modernised. We had a lot of friends and family due to stay in the house with us in the run up to, and after, the wedding and we didn’t want anyone having to fight over hot water! Luckily, there’s plenty at Ash Barton.

"And lastly, we wanted somewhere laid back. We loved the fact that Simon basically said you can keep going as late as you like and be as loud as you like!"

Was there a theme?

"Yes! We took Baz Luhrmann’s Romeo + Juliet as our inspiration. I love the film. Brendan’s dad was part of the crew and Brendan was an extra in the film."

Did that influence your wedding dress?

"The gown wasn’t massively important to me. I felt our money was better spent on props, booze and food (as I’m a massive foodie)!

"I was also just recovering from having our baby boy a few months earlier, so I was conscious my body wouldn’t allow me to wear some of the things I would have liked.

"Luckily, I came across this dress at a lovely little bridal shop near my Mum’s place (in Epping, Essex). Sadly, the shop has since shut down, but the owner was very kind, welcoming and helpful, and of the many dresses I tried on, I loved this one.

"The ruching was reminiscent of the dress Claire Danes wore as Juliet in the film. The bodice did an amazing job of pulling my post-baby body in to shape and it just looked and felt ‘right’. And, of course, I just had to add the wings too!"

Who did your make-up and hair?

"My hair was done by Terri from Pinned to Perfection. She was fantastic! I had my hair curled with the front in a loose waterfall braid. I covered this with a hat for the beach scene, then my hair was put up for the ball scene. My sister-in-law did my make-up. I kept it neutral for the first two scenes then pumped it up for the ball."

And what did the groom wear?

"Brendan wore a Hawaiian shirt and jeans for the beach scene then faux armour and a mask later in the day!"

Tell us about the day itself

"We’re big fans of immersive theatre and cinema, particularly the elements of surprise and role playing.

"Before the big day we allocated each guest a ‘family’; either Montague or Capulet so they could dress accordingly. We also set up a Facebook group and there was some great banter between the families even before the big day.

"On the day itself, to maintain the element of surprise, we arranged coaches to pick everyone up and bring them to Ash Barton. They arrived at the beach scene for welcome cocktails and canapés.

"After about an hour, we had four rampaging drag queens turn up, make a bit of a scene then lead the guests to the courtyard for the ceremony. At this point Brendan and I were both meant to change but Brendan got side-tracked by ‘Pope John Sizzle the 69th’ so he was still in his beach outfit for the ceremony! 

"The ceremony, like most of the day was ad libbed and pretty hysterical. The theme of the day, really, was laughter. So much love and laughter."

"After that the drag queens led everyone into the barn AKA Capulet mansion. We had told people they needed smarter attire after beachwear, so most brought a change of clothes which they got into. The effort was immense and so impressive! We then had a great party in the barn with performances by the drag queens John Sizzle, A Man to Pet, Stella Meltdown and Margo Marshall, interspersed with their DJ sets."

"A friend also sang Des’ree’s Kissing You from the film for our first dance, which was very moving. Towards the end of the evening we had desserts set out in the wedding chapel which was adorned with illuminated floral crosses with choral music playing in the background, reminiscent of the scene in the chapel where Romeo and Juliet die. This was the biggest wow factor for a number of our guests."

"The final coaches left at 1.30am-ish but many of the guests kept partying in the chapel."

What did everyone eat and drink throughout the day?

"We had Rusty Pig from Ottery St Mary do the catering. The food was amazing. I’m sad I didn’t eat as much as I would have done if it wasn’t my wedding!"

"We started with manapes (large canapes) of chorizo sausage rolls and falafel scotch eggs. Then had wild garlic and harissa lamb sliders; dexter beef and parmesan, halloumi and nettle pistou; and crab and prawn paella with asparagus."

"The mini desserts we had in the chapel were by Nikola at Made by Ws and included mini banoffee pies and mini Eton messes. They were very popular!"

What did you eat on the day before and the day after the wedding?

"I’m lucky enough to have married into a foodie family who made incredible tacos the night before the wedding. The day after we probably hosted around 50 for a BBQ. Most had stonking hangovers!"

What was the best thing about Ash Barton on the day?

"Having all the separate spaces which we could reveal incrementally. Also having an area which we could dedicate as the kids’ section. We arranged a creche so parents could completely relax, including two of the larger ground floor rooms and the walled garden."

Who was your wedding photographer?

"Luna Weddings. They were great at capturing the action and lunacy of the day. As soon as Anna told me she loved the film it seemed the perfect pairing!"

Any funny mishaps to report?

"Timings were changed at the last minute to avoid the storm. We brought the ceremony forward, but no one told my Mum and stepdad. They missed the ceremony and brought our little boy, Seb, out in his PJs instead of the tux we had for him. And Brendan didn’t change in time for the ceremony either!

"To be honest the whole thing was chaotic and hilarious. The drag queens hadn’t factored in my change time prior to the ceremony so had to ad lib in the courtyard including this scene where they were all trying to seduce my husband-to-be which made me giggle from the window upstairs."

What were the most magical moments of the day?

"There were a few! My friend Anna (Sparkle Darkly) singing Kissing You. Seeing the look of awe on the faces of the guests as each scene was revealed. My stepdad coming out into the courtyard in his little blue y-fronts, as he didn’t realise there were bottoms to his gladiator costume. And of course, one of the drag queens was quick to bend down in front of him to make the whole thing look completely inappropriate! And the immense storm which kicked off halfway through the ball with thunder and lightning which added to the incredible atmosphere."

Any tips for other Ash Barton brides and grooms?

"We had tipis which were a life saver when the heavens opened during the beach scene. Other than that, I'd say don’t get pregnant in the run up to your wedding. It’s a real bummer when you have to leave the party to breastfeed!"

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